Alter 100 [5/12]
“Is this what I wanted?” you ask yourself repeatedly and tirelessly. “But sex is a need,” you justify rightly every time you guilt yourself. “I will delete the app now,” you promise for the nth time.
You don’t believe that, do you?
(You did delete it, though – for the nth time. But just reinstall it anytime freely.)
*
“I guess you’re active,” he teases. You would smirk, as always, when a man lying opposite of you gives that impression. Well, a correct presumption.
How could they know? You often ask yourself. You just do hook up at least once a week. Or do you remember the day when you had three?
(Not at the same time and altogether, though. But it is another story to tell, I bet. #threesome)
Define active…is what you would reply to the man now breaking your embrace. Then he would predictably refuse to say the word – the act that you just did. The man in his glowing face is now tongue-tied. Well, you’re just trying to keep the conversation he started.
How is that a man can ask for sex but cannot dare speak it?
And that’s the picture repeatedly and untiringly playing in your head. It wouldn’t stop now, would it? When the present situation isolates and upsets everyone, perhaps you just miss the act or at least the idea. Yet the scenario bothers you. It bothers you because you’re confused. You couldn’t make your mind whether you’re the one I’m referring to or the man I’m pertaining you into. But the man is just the idea. The man who asks can just be you; the man who answers can also just be you - the man who breaks cuddles, the man who starts and finishes a conversation, the man with the obvious after-sex glow-up face, and the man who gets speechlessly embarrassed. You can be and were the man who could ask for sex but couldn’t dare speak it.
I guess what confuses you is the fact that you can just be both.
You have been active. You have had different conversations, but post-sex conversation depends on the man and not you and sometimes on you and not the man. It just always depends. It depends if you enjoy the sex and like the person; sadly, you can only experience either. You rarely get both.
*
You don’t believe that, do you?
(You did delete it, though – for the nth time. But just reinstall it anytime freely.)
*
How could they know? You often ask yourself. You just do hook up at least once a week. Or do you remember the day when you had three?
(Not at the same time and altogether, though. But it is another story to tell, I bet. #threesome)
Define active…is what you would reply to the man now breaking your embrace. Then he would predictably refuse to say the word – the act that you just did. The man in his glowing face is now tongue-tied. Well, you’re just trying to keep the conversation he started.
How is that a man can ask for sex but cannot dare speak it?
How is that a man can ask for sex but cannot dare speak it?
*
I guess what confuses you is the fact that you can just be both.
You have been active. You have had different conversations, but post-sex conversation depends on the man and not you and sometimes on you and not the man. It just always depends. It depends if you enjoy the sex and like the person; sadly, you can only experience either. You rarely get both.
You heard the notification again. It excites you even after the nth time. Swiping repeatedly and exchanging the same start-up messages tirelessly is a justified habit. But you thought, you deserve more than the hook-up app. You believed that, didn’t you?
30 May 2020
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A monthly exhibition of the Alter world. 2020 watch out! For the next entries, [links to be published every last day/week of each month]JANUARY - Alter 100 [1/12]
FEBRUARY - Alter 100 [2/12]
MARCH - Alter 100 [3/12]
APRIL - Alter 100 [4/12]
MAY - Alter 100 [5/12]
MIDSPECIAL - Alter 100 [6.1/12] SPECIAL
JUNE - Alter 100 [6/12]
JULY - Alter 100 [7/12]
FEBRUARY - Alter 100 [2/12]
MARCH - Alter 100 [3/12]
APRIL - Alter 100 [4/12]
MAY - Alter 100 [5/12]
MIDSPECIAL - Alter 100 [6.1/12] SPECIAL
JUNE - Alter 100 [6/12]
JULY - Alter 100 [7/12]
AUGUST - Alter 100 [8/12]
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