The Boy Who Stutters

18 is such a checkpoint. The rite of passage that we dreadfully await, hoping for a, if not better, newer experience in life.  Nope. I’m not going to put an effort into making a decent introduction for this one. What’s the point of painting a picture that is different from what you feel and think? Write a letter forgiving yourself for something you’ve been upset about.  My 2018 journal has ice-breaker sections such as this but I never truly reached that page because who am I kidding? I like writing diaries as much as I like the quality pages and slick covers yet having never actually consumed all of its entirety. We often think we like the thing but in fact, we only like the idea of that thing.  Sounds familiar? We are not in love. We just like the idea of being in love. At some point, we all have been there – not knowing what we really want. It kind of sucks – not knowing . But why does ‘ knowing ’ seem to suck even more? Knowing that something ...

Five months have passed since I entered the University. I got my official I.D., did not drop any classes yet, had my first production in one of my majors, received my final grades and passed them all. What a good start, my confidante says. Then I found myself to be back at square one . New people. New environment. New arena.  As I regularly go home every weekend, I bumped into a junior schoolmate of mine in high school who is now a senior and she wanted to ask me about life beyond the walls of JILS (acronym of my high school). She was probably all curious as I was when I badly wanted to finally graduate and go into college. And now she is about to and now here I am! What is it like? I thought I already knew the obvious disparity between high school and college but boy, the ironies they are. You were asked to always stand every time you recite in class before until you always have to remind yourself not to when your professor calls you - or else, you will be asked to pleas...

SUKAT AT TUGMA Nagbubuhol-buhol – buhol ang mga titik Nagwawala, walang ideya sa isip Sa lahat ng tanong, natira ang bakit Bakit? …may mga bagay na di ko mabatid Nasisid ang kailaliman ng dagat Kataas-taasang hakbang ay naakyat Ngunit hindi mawala-wala ang lamat Sa mga ala-alang walang mga pamagat ‘Yong lumang basong hindi mapuno-puno Busog sa umaapaw na argumento At ika’y tumalon, natapos ang gulo Tumahimik sila, loob ay nanlumo Sinungaling ang tingin ng iyong mga mata Nahulog sa bangin – walang nakakita Mababaw raw pero sobrang tinik pala Hoy! Bigyan pansin naman nawa ng madla. Ang Hikahos ng Depresyon 12.15.17 Image by Thomas Budach from Pixabay

A remarkable show that might be one of the finest among others. Shrek The Musical has something that would make you love it. The Musical’s wonderful songs, great actors, amazing production, and its undying story are incredible. The show is full-packed and you wouldn’t get over it instantly. Watching a world-class performance is overwhelming, plus the spectacular production that’s awe-inspiring. The show gave painstakingly justice to its origin and it really gives the whole idea of what “Shrek” is all about; what friendship really means, how freedom and discrimination are depicted, and what true love truly meant.             Shrek The Musical has very talented artists. The artists can dance, sing, and act; of course, they are artists after all. There’s one thing I have observed and made me more astounded, the live orchestra under the stage who gives a more valuable asset to the play. They really played a significant role in the pl...

SONETO P inintang itsura sa muka A nggulong pinili at sinadya N agbabadyang bagong bulalakaw G abi nang sinalakay, pipe ang sigaw U nang taon, hiling ang hamon L ahat nakaabang sa daloy ng alon O ras at bibig ay tumatakbo D angal ay tangay-tangay ng tao U tang na loob ay nilamon T alaga bang may rebolusyon? E rmat ang turing at palayaw R odrigo ang ngalan ng bulalakaw T otoo or trapo – ito ay pulitika E kis sa ilan; bayani para sa iba.  12.5.17 Malikhaing Pagsulat

DIONA Sinta kong minamahal May handong kasiyahan Giliw ko – akin ka lang! TANAGA Kasakiman ng dilim Paligid na malagim Ang liwanag ng araw Hatid ay sika’t linaw HAIKU Pighati’t poot Mula sa sipa’t suntok Ito ang sukli. 11.27.17 Malikhaing Pagsulat 

Do you believe in God?             Do you believe in God? Apparently, not everyone does. This is an intriguing question that I couldn’t answer myself even I wanted to. Do I believe? Do you believe? I have gotten to the point where I almost lost my faith. I have gotten to the point when I did my best to make myself believe. Maybe my faith isn’t as strong as how it supposed to be, like the others, and how I wished it to be. I am no wise to oppose anything or anyone. I am not against and I’m not into contradiction. Agnostic, I consider myself. I suppose I answered the first question myself and it seems that it is meant for me. Have you ever fallen in love?             Have you ever fallen in love? This seems an obvious question that we all want to answer. I would want to ask this to someone who has been so focused in prioritizing things he needed to, who has been so oc...

     "You know yourself better," as they say. People usually believe that one knows himself better than anyone else. I guess it may and may not be true since one has undergone the struggle of trying understanding oneself. I have been there, we all have been there: a situation where you could not figure out who you are and ending up asking, who am I?      I am not a self-proclaimed person who entitles himself with anything that sounds good and just to make himself feel better. Like the others, I am flawed, perfect with imperfections. I have asked what other people's impression of me and there's something that stood up the most: serious and snob. However, that doesn't speak completely about me as it serves only their impression about me. But then I figured that I will be able to know myself better with the help of the people around me, so I asked them the same question I asked myself, who am I?      "You're responsible, or...

Have you ever wondered what might happen if you gave up on something? Do you ever realize what would happen if you give up? Have you experienced the feeling of losing hope? What would you do if you encounter such a situation? How hard is it for you to keep your Hope? Have you ever questioned yourself how long can you hold on? Why is it so important that we must keep at least a mere amount of it? Hope is the only thing that we can hold on to when everything has fallen. It is the only thing that most people keep with. Everything will be accomplished if we have trust and hope to ourselves. Hope makes people stronger. It makes us more eager to accomplish something we wanted. It can keep our life flowing. It is a fact that Hope is the reason why the impossible can be possible. I am really inspired by this quote  “A human being lives with hope. In fact, hope is his only property." I can say that it’s really accurate, isn’t it? Having Hope is one of the most valuable asset...

You woke up in a different bed. The place doesn't seem familiar. Of course, you didn't look around because there's no time for that once your lips touch. And now you're looking around, noticing the undone dishes, the stack on the table, and the dust on your headboard. You didn't care about those things when your bodies were all heat up - on the spur of the moment - last night. After all, that's all what you came for - satisfaction, pleasure, and flesh. You moved and saw the body of the person you were so eager to touch. You turned to yourself and saw that red blemish under your chest. You tried but failed. At your frustration, it didn't go away. You reached your top and as you fitted that wrinkled cloth, you searched for your underwear. You uncovered the blanket, only to cover more the nude person on the other side. There you saw what you were looking for. You finally stood up, dressed until someone woke up and bothered you. "What time is it?...

I don’t know where to start. I had a dream, a nightmare. It’s a nightmare and it creeps the hell outta me. Yea, I’m scared. I know that I don’t really have to share this but something just urges me to write it. I also want to prevent experiencing de ja vu or to be prepared in the future so let me write my dream. First night in my dream Our bed was still a double-deck. My brother is sleeping under while I’m on the top. (I can’t really determine the exact image of my dream. I can’t; maybe because it wasn’t a lucid dreaming. I couldn’t repeat that image when I was in sleep. If you’re confused, I may repeat a certain dream when I’m in that state. Maybe you’re not familiar with it but to those who can relate, you can understand me.) Back to my brother, he stated that there was a little girl in his bed when he got in. I can’t remember where I was when he said that. I can’t also remember the exact position of the both of us. (That’s all I can recall for the first night). Second Night (Right n...

Fear is a choice. Danger is real. Do you fear anything?   Is it too scary or creepy? Do your fears control you or can you control your fears? Can you manage your fears? Can you do whatever it takes just to overcome it? Do you let others know about your fears? Have you ever sought help to get rid of it? Have you ever thought if that fear really terrified you?  All of us have something to fear. Most of us have something to hide from. Each one of us has something to keep with ourselves.              Phobia. What is Phobia? It is a persistent fear of something that the victim is experiencing. Sometimes it may turn as an extreme fear of an object, specific creatures or situations in the surroundings. We cannot determine one’s fear unless there’s something that triggered it; for example, when someone has a fear with certain insect and the sufferer unintentionally touched it or even just saw it, he/she migh...

“Life is a dream for the wise, a game for the fool, only a comedy for the rich and a tragedy for the poor.” Life is a choice, a choice to be good and a choice to be bad. Life is a gift, a gift given to you every day. Life is a blessing, a blessing when you wake up every morning. Life is everything, everything you want and everything you wish. Life is a decision, a decision to continue or end it. Life is a path, a path to go forward or to move backward. Life is a reality and a fantasy, a reality when you open your eyes and just a fantasy only in your mind. Life is the gap between birth and death. It is the presence of existence and not the absence of it. Life is being alive. It is how you value the time given to you by the Creator. It is how you live and survive everyday challenges. Life is how you accept the tests and trials set by this world. It is a gift and a blessing that check us if we’re worthy of it. Life is created to make changes, to make new things, and to discover myst...

“It is not about who's better in proving a point. It is about how good you are in controlling your ego,” a piece of thoughtful advice  from my classmate. That advice is a meaningful one. That statement ruled me on my every action. It becomes one of my life guides in associating people. But first, do you know what is ego? Do you have any idea on how it affects your relationship with others? Can you say how high or low your ego is? Can you manage it by associating your fellowmen? Do you ever mind your ego? What is ego? Every time I’m hearing the word “ego”, there’s something always goes on my mind, the term “better”. It is the opinion that you have about yourself, according to my dictionary. It is synonymous with your pride and self-esteem. It is how you see yourself as better and more important than others. It is only your own thinking that minds how others look at you. It is the thing in your mind that always matters in dealing with others. We all have different egos. Each ...

A world without Science is like Facebook without friends, YouTube without videos, Twitter with no trends, Instagram with no followers and Google without results. A world without technology is like a song without notes, a phone with no contacts, a movie without a plot, a pen with no ink and a book without writings. Science is the study of everything. Technology is the application of Science. Science helps our daily living. Technology improves our existence.  My classmate once told me, “Imagine a world without Science.” I need to think about it. While I’m imagining, my Mind starts to laugh. “There’s no world without Science,” teased my Mind. Yes, that’s right. Science is a natural matter in this world. Everything in this world is observed and tested through Science. We have to base our life on it. It will help us to learn new things. Science can give us a better way of living. Technology is using Science for the vantage of this world. It is made to help others, to assist lives a...

What a blunt title, right? Well, I couldn't title it any better now. One Professor admittedly told us this TRUTH!!! It's been more than a month for me - as evident as paying this month's dorm rent, shopping for my grocery, evaluating my personal and academic routine, and keeping my sanity. I'm not going to write a regular entry on my UP Life, or will I? It just happens that I got hundreds of reads with my prior entry about U.P. and I guessed that some of you might still be interested about 'me' or just my 'UP Life' perspective, OR "UP" alone. Regardless, CONSIDER YOURSELF AS PART OF MY JOURNEY NOW! I might as well take you into places, but you have the freedom to stop reading my potential blogs re my take on my college life. So what has happened in the first month of my stay in Diliman? (Though I regularly go back to Los Banos every weekend because ELBI IS HOME - always has been, always will be ) Exhausting Having a no-break/no-vac...